Michael Jackson is not Available

For the record, before I begin, I'm glad Michael Jackson is gone. Yeah, yeah, I know he's not, "gone," gone, but he's gone. I'm not obsessed with death or contemplating suicide or anything like that. I'm not a super-hardcore fan either, but Mike was the man, and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't trying (and failing miserably) to moonwalk 15 minutes ago.*

Michael Jackson is not dead. He's just not available.

Michael Jackson is not available:
- For interviews
- For photo ops
- To be the butt of bad jokes that aren't funny
- To give paparazzi something to do
- To lend anyone money
- For liars to attempt to extort money from him
- For any sort of comeback
- To be ridiculed and insulted

. ... Any more.

Michael Jackson was a regular guy who lived a crazy life. Sure; he's done things that some probably don't agree with. I have, too, and so have you. As far as the child molestation stuff goes, I wasn't there, so I can't say what's true and what's not. However, some people have admitted to have lied about Michael. Those people will have have to answer to someone, just like Mike will. What those conversations will sound like, only Mike and those people will know.

I'm glad Michael Jackson is gone. Comedians will have to either write him out of their routines, or drastically alter their material regarding him. Now, I'm a sucker for a good joke, even one about Michael, but this guy's probably had enough. Even the bully knows that once the kid is crying on the floor, spitting out teeth and blood, that it's time to go pick on someone else.

CNN showed a clip of reporter, Egberto Willies (Sorry. I don't have the link.). In it he said, "I grew up on Michael Jackson, I loved Michael Jackson. I hated Michael Jackson. I admired Michael Jackson. I was ashamed of Michael Jackson. I was sorry for Michael Jackson. I was proud of Michael Jackson." I couldn't have said it better myself.

I'm glad Michael Jackson is gone. He doesn't have to worry. ... Anymore. ... About anything.

Michael Jackson is not available to worry about:
- Poverty
- War
- Taxes
- Racism
- Everything else he was concerned about
- All the petty things everyone else worries about

So, I'm glad he's gone. He's lucky.

Michael Jackson is not dead.

He's just not available. He apologizes for any inconvenience.


*I've also been jealous for years of my little cousin's ability to moonwalk.